Are You Running Away from What You Feel?

"I'm not running away," you might say.

But our minds know countless subtle ways to escape what we're feeling right now.

Try noticing the moments when you find yourself thinking:

"I don't want to feel this."

"I don't want this to be happening."

"I wish things were different."

"I never want to go through this again."

These are often the moments when we start looking for a way out.

The tricky part is that we don't always realize we're actually running away.

Imagine this.

Your colleague gets praised by your boss.

You don't.

What might happen next?

Maybe you explain it all away.

You tell yourself it's not a big deal.

You're happy for them.

Your turn will come.

And just to make sure you're feeling okay, you remind yourself of everything you should be grateful for.

Maybe you have a wonderful partner, while your colleague is single.

On the surface, this sounds healthy.

But sometimes even positive thinking can become a way of avoiding what is really happening inside us.

Someone else runs in the opposite direction.

They get angry at their colleague and at their boss.

They see it as unfair and find plenty of reasons why their anger is completely justified.

Someone else decides they simply need to work harder.

Try harder.

Improve themselves so no one ever gets ahead of them again.

Someone pours a drink after work.

Or finishes the whole bottle.

Someone raids the fridge.

Someone exhausts themselves at the gym.

Someone tries to prove their worth by finding a one-night stand.

We all run in different directions.

But often, we're running from the very same feeling.

Does that feeling disappear?

For a while, it may seem like it does.

But then another situation comes along.

A different colleague.

A different partner.

A different boss.

A different argument.

And suddenly, the very same feeling is back.

You realize you've actually known it your whole life.

It just keeps wearing different masks.

We often believe the problem is a particular situation or a particular person.

My experience has been different.

The situations change.

The people change.

But the feeling stays the same.

Maybe it says:

"I'm not good enough."

"There's never a place for me."

"I don't matter."

These are exactly the kinds of feelings we work with in BeTrue.

Not by trying to convince ourselves they shouldn't be there.

Not by replacing them with more positive ones.

But by gently exploring where they come from and allowing ourselves to fully feel them.

And very often, that's when they no longer have to run our lives.

Does any of this feel familiar?

Is there something in your life right now that you'd really love to get rid of?

Take a moment.

Pause.

And simply notice what you're truly feeling.

Or, if you'd like, you can write to me about it.