Why Does It Still Hurt Years Later?

Maybe someone close to you died. A partner, a parent, or a beloved pet. Or someone you wanted to spend your life with left.

Months have passed, perhaps years. And yet a mention, a photograph, or a memory is enough to bring the pain back. Sorrow, sadness, helplessness, sometimes anger. You try to push it away, to think about something else so you can feel okay again.

Maybe you pushed that pain aside because it was too much. You needed to keep going and didn't know how to be with everything you were feeling. No one had taught you. Maybe you were afraid that if you really let yourself feel it, it would overwhelm you.

So whenever it comes up, you try to avoid it again. That may bring some relief for a while, but the next memory brings back the same pain.

In BeTrue, you can gradually open up to that pain with a guide and allow yourself to feel it.

What does that mean? Bringing your attention to what you feel right now. Noticing how that feeling shows up in your body and allowing it to be there without trying to push it away or change it. Your guide supports you through the process. You don't have to know how to do it on your own.

Sometimes the hardest part is the fear of what will happen if we let the pain in. It can seem so overwhelming that it feels as though it could kill us. We don't have to force our way through that fear either. We can start right there, with the fear itself.

My experience is that when we allow ourselves to feel what we have been resisting, the pain can move through us, followed by relief. Peace. A sense that it no longer weighs on us.

When we then bring our attention back to that person or situation, we may find that the same pain no longer arises. There is peace.

The memory remains. So does the love. But something that used to tighten inside us at every mention has eased.

If you carry this kind of pain and would like to open up to it with support, I'd be happy to guide you.